Friday, September 19, 2008

emo again and again


Everything has back to normal
and yet
loneliness still with me

some how

don't feel any belonging at all

Thank you for letting me
realizing all the stuff

everything
even close trusted friend can do

seems like everything is back where it used to be
on the outside
on the inside
i've no idea how you guys think

this is a place where i can put
all my thoughts
all my feelings here

don't give a shit on how you think
no matter how you think
is your brain make u think
i didn't
so don't give me a S-H-I-T


this is a place for me
to write
to express

and you

just read



as for now
i can't wait for my finals to finish
and go back home

don't feel like staying here
i wanna go back home


so emo nowadays~!




-being crowned as emo queen-

Friday, September 12, 2008

being emo again~

slowly
day by day
i learnt that

it takes a lot of courage to believe in someone

even though you know that person for ages

sometimes
i don't even trust myself

don't even know
whether
my own self
will lie to me or not

Recently
a lot of things happened

things that i wished
that it never happened

somehow
i wish that time can go backwards
so that i can reverse all the stupid things i had done

hurting people around me
is not the thing i want it to happen

i know that i made mistake too
mistake that never can be forgiven
mistake that hurt people unintentionally
mistake that make me regret so much

when people ask
"Are you Ok?"
"Are you fine?"
"Why you look so sad?"

this make my heart feel better

because

no one
especially own friends
will pretend to be nice by asking you that

they will ask because they care
they afraid you've been hurt

even that they are not close to you
they will still ask

even stranger will too

im not a pretender
im not a angel outside devil inside
im not a faker

eventhough
you may think i am
all i can say is
your judgement is your judgement
i can't really do anything

maybe
sometimes
my action
the way i talk
misunderstood you

all i can say is
i'm sorry
i really am
and
i really do care
from the bottom of my heart

im too not a loner
fear to be alone
always wanted to be in the crowd
where people friends
are talking
joking with you

even you are hiding
but still because you don't want to let other to see your weakness
your sadness

that's why always brings a smile whenever you go
until you find someone that you trust the most
only then the real self will be lighted up

sometimes
i too
just wanna cry

now
tears fill my eyes
heart is bleeding
heart is aching

reason?
maybe is cuz of that
that thing that make us apart
why it has to turn out like this?



and



now is exam time. i totally have no mood to study at all. can predict that my result will not be good.

no mood to study
no mood to do anything else

hoping that
everything will disappear by itself


-sorry for everything-



Wednesday, September 10, 2008

life is unfair

i understand

but you said that

we didn't put ourselves in your shoes and think

then did you?

the reason why we make that decision is because we did

we know that you can't be alone
we know that you liked it here
we know that you don't wish to move
we know that you wanted to be here
without any changes

that's why we made that kind of decisions

we even thought that

what going to happen to your work

how you going to face them
how you going to attend your functions or meeting

and everything else

and

you said that we being unfair?
you said that we being cruel to them?

are we?

aren't they cruel to us too?

do you think of that?

there's no perfect ending
there's no happy ending in this kind of world

you can't want both parties have the perfect happy ending
one of the party will get hurt no matter what

now

we are the party that got hurts
unintentionally by you

life is unfair
no matter what

Truth always hurts

why it has to turn out like this?

this is not what i want to know

I trusted you

and

I never though that you will say it

i really did not

i guess

that day i walk out the room unexpectedly

because

i can't hold back anymore

i just wanna cry it out
the feeling of being backstabbed
is sucks

and

i can imagine the pain of those people when they first heard it

sorry

i really am

the truth and all the explanation u given
i understand

but it hurts
my heart

on that moment
heartache
alot

never ever thought that you'll say it out
feel like being betrayed
backstabbed

even now when i think of it
my heart still ache

i really do hope that
there's no changes in between our friendship

although i know that u feel sad
you feel afraid
you feel that you have to face to talk to us anymore

but still

i really hope that
there's no changes

friends still friends
no matter what


"Friends is just like air. You can't see it you can't feel it. But it is important to you. Without it, there's nothing else worth living for."

Friday, September 05, 2008

朋友

在这么多人里面
我们能认识是一种缘分
在这么多人里面
我们能变成朋友是命中注定


我们能认识
是应我们有共同的梦想


我的人生电脑
存了我们所有的美好快乐的回忆


友情难得到
不要因一点误会
而毁了这友情


朋友难得到
不要因一句话
而有了距离


现实的残酷
现实的考验
带来了喜怒哀乐
不管怎样
我们都要坚强的面对
肩并肩的
手牵手的
一起勇敢的面对


希望
在未来的日子
不要因一点误会
而成了大家的友情裂痕


我们之间
的友情来的不容易
不要因一句话而毁了我们的感情


开心难过的时候
都是需要朋友的安慰
都是需要朋友的拥抱


我们之间不要有裂痕好不好?
把所有的问题都解决好不好?

Wednesday, September 03, 2008

15 个可不可以

可不可以不勇敢
可不可以不坚强
可不可以不失望
可不可以不改变
可不可以不完美
可不可以不隐藏
可不可以不服从
可不可以不烦恼
可不可以不放弃
可不可以不讨厌
可不可以不伪装
可不可以不思念
可不可以不后悔
可不可以不强颜欢笑
可不可以什么都不知道!!!!!!!